This Sonnet Thing is Tough!

Whew! It took me a while, and I gave up on the rhyme scheme partway through, but here's my rewrite of Sonnet XIX.

Sonnet 19 – Revised by b-nice

Time, feel free to degrade the lion’s claws,

Let everything on the earth return to dust,

Let the teeth fall out of old tigers' maws,

And burn the phoenix while she's still robust.

Let winter, spring, summer and fall come and go,

And do whatsoever you care

To the world's flora and fauna.

But don’t you dare

Put a single wrinkle on my love’s forehead.

Or veins or age spots.

Let him remain unchanged

So future generations will always admire his beauty.

     Actually, never mind. Go ahead and make him old.

     He’ll always be young in my poetry.

And here's the original Sonnet XIX by the Bard himself for comparison:

SONNET XIX

Devouring Time, blunt thou the lion's paws,
And make the earth devour her own sweet brood;
Pluck the keen teeth from the fierce tiger's jaws,
And burn the long-lived phoenix in her blood;
Make glad and sorry seasons as thou fleets,
And do whate'er thou wilt, swift-footed Time,
To the wide world and all her fading sweets;
But I forbid thee one most heinous crime:
O, carve not with thy hours my love's fair brow,
Nor draw no lines there with thine antique pen;
Him in thy course untainted do allow
For beauty's pattern to succeeding men.
      Yet, do thy worst, old Time: despite thy wrong,
      My love shall in my verse ever live young.